At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
