I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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