Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
How external is "for external use only"?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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