when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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