I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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