Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Randomize
