Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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