So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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