I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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