this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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