I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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