he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
