Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
my shit smells like andre
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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