So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
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Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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