why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize