third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize