I look better un-naked...
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
