so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I pour the whiskey from now on
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
