id be glad to
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
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we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
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Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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