And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
