Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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