I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
We had to coat check the pizza.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
