I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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