You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Randomize
