he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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