So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
