I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
