I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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