You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
