Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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