Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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