I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
