We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
