He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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