I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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