yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
