She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Is Oprah even human
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize