is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
it was like eating out sand paper
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
This toilet bowl is my home.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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