Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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