i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
How's work?
Spinning.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
