Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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