South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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