I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
