In the future we'll all be gay
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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