why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Randomize
