Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  You really coming over, don't trick.

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  (313): You really coming over, don't trick. http://tfl.nu/futk
  Replies (2) Good night (884) Bad night (1485) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.

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  (604): Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum. http://tfl.nu/jh54
  Replies (13) Good night (519) Bad night (710) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.

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  (330): I would have at least made out with you if you were showered. http://tfl.nu/yd8o
  Replies (3) Good night (536) Bad night (1750) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.

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  (845): You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately. http://tfl.nu/vwdv
  Replies (9) Good night (5486) Bad night (925)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.

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  (401): just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October. http://tfl.nu/w9iv
  Replies (4) Good night (2653) Bad night (893) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.

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  (240): She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text. http://tfl.nu/g6ne
  Replies (4) Good night (556) Bad night (2112) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean

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  (+44): just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean http://tfl.nu/t9ec
  Replies (9) Good night (3732) Bad night (921) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night

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  (609): Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night http://tfl.nu/7184
  Replies (17) Good night (5006) Bad night (1066) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?

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  (425): I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome? http://tfl.nu/4kcb
  Replies (13) Good night (2179) Bad night (659) Order T-Shirt
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  (386): View more from Florida

  Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".

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  (386): Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant". http://tfl.nu/zn3b
  Replies (20) Good night (2270) Bad night (1899) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever

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  (715): All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever http://tfl.nu/1qjr
  Replies (3) Good night (519) Bad night (880) Order T-Shirt
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy

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  (989): I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy http://tfl.nu/as9c
  Replies (5) Good night (2276) Bad night (404) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.

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  (617): Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee. http://tfl.nu/9xkv
  Replies (2) Good night (1972) Bad night (361) Order T-Shirt
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  (951): View more from California

  You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.

  (1-951): View more from California

  This is the first time I'm hearing this information.

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  (951): You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you. (1-951): This is the first time I'm hearing this information. http://tfl.nu/wdlz
  Replies (20) Good night (3524) Bad night (461)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.

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  (317): I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense. http://tfl.nu/526h
  Replies (2) Good night (716) Bad night (222) Order T-Shirt

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