Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Randomize
