I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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