please come you make the beer taste better
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
