i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Randomize
