Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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