Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
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how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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