I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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